Each message sent,
Is one too many,
As I slowly cascade into this decent,
Feelings remain unnamed,
Though I’m connected to the anchor of their weight,
I push those feelings into the darkest corners of my heart,
I fear when I bleed they will surface,
These thoughts of you will tear me apart,
Vocalization can fix this,
Instead I choose to twist it,
Into knots in the pit of stomach,
So the butterflies will not be released,
I don’t want to wander this road,
Staring at my feet,
With my heart skipping every other beat,
Those missing rythmes,
Leaving my chest to find you,
Casting themselves free,
So some of me may remain alive,
While the rest of me dies,
Sewn shut is my mouth,
These words are trapped,
I promised myself I would not let them out,
For this river of love,
Is in a drought.
Do you ever catch sight of something so beautiful that you lose track of your feet?
Do you ever hear a melody so sweet that you get lost in the rhythm of the beat?
Have you ever seen,
In the vastness of someone’s eyes,
Their wildest dreams,
And the things that make them feel alive?
As the Moonlight hit her face,
My thoughts just stopped,
Frozen in place.
Stuck on one thought,
Is she actually real?
The whites of her eyes matched that of a blank canvas.
Painting images of happiness.
Showing me again what it is like to feel.
My heart is patched on my sleeve,
Ripped more times than I can count,
Just waiting for you to leave,
I live in a world of doubt,
Prepared with needle and thread,
The words I know are coming,
Or is it just in my head.
The end is looming,
I broke the stitching for you,
This isn’t something you can just fix with glue.
Ripped at every seem,
I would give everything for you,
Is that so hard to believe,
Instead you start slipping of view,
Now I’m left here torn in two,
Out of thread,
What am I to do,
My head is filled with dread.
It seems my inspiration comes in waves,
Only arrives when I’m in pain, or on these rainy days.
It used to come into view, back when I loved you.
My Muse, skipping time with the dudes.
Just to be with you.
Now I’m left feeling.
Like my heart’s gone 12 rounds.
Every round I’ve been knocked down.
These punches leave me reeling.
Kneeling on the ground.
Trying to figure this whole thing out.
If love were a river, I think I’m in a drought.
What I’ve found out, I’ll never be the winner.
Been on the losing end my whole life.
I used to get KO’d every night.
Faded, like I was lacking light.
Trying to take flight, to forget this life.
Forget how lonely I am.
Forget how I have no friends.
Besides the few, one of them being you.
What am I to do.
When all I wanted was you.
You left me black and blue.
It’s nothing new, it’s surreal.
I miss the view, miss that smile.
Those brown eyes that shimmered like mahogany.
But like the latest fashions, I went out of style.
Too quickly, to put it simply.
I gave you all the life I had left.
Now I’m left drained and in distress.
Literally, I’m a mess.
I can hold myself together for a few moments at best.
Life has put me to the test, mental illness has stolen my breath.
Weighing me down like a bullet proof vest.
Not protecting my heart, just bringing me stress.
Her touch brings me alive,
She is my electricity,
Her smile is brighter than a neon sign,
In a dark city,
She is an overcharged capacitor,
Of positive energy,
But she stays grounded,
Not due to gravity,
The thunder has sounded,
Her bolt of lightning found me,
The lonely tree,
I was surrounded,
With her positivity,
She has set me free.